Can it be true?

Hmm?

Acedemics Suck?!

I used to love school belive it or not.

I was a good student, and it was at school where I was privilaged with the ability to sociolize with friends.

These days, it seems all I get is too much work, so much so that it gets to the point I can't do it, it drives me nuts.

However, I found recently that simple worksheets are a good way to keep my mind quiet at night. (Refer to "Waking Nightmares" below) The simple machanics of it give me something to think about other than things which make me anxious....

anyway, I'm headed off to bed now... GOODNIGHT!

Action!

Well, as of the end of the school year last year, I was an official member of the Cast for Othello. I was the "First Senator" with a total of not enough lines.

Today, first day of the second week of school, I have no part, and there is no longer a play.

I went to every practice I could, making sure to have my lines down by the time I got there, but little by little over the summer, participants quit, and our cast was down to ten. So Othello was droped.

Tomorow, I'll be looking forward to auditioning for the play that is to replace it. The Actor's Nightmare and ...something else, I forget.

Intellectual Persuits Begin

As of yesterday, school has started for the 12th time in my intellectual career.

'Twas exiting mostly... A lot of my classes are ones that I am actualy looking forward to; AP psyc. and CG2 are at the top of the list... I had to dash around all eight of my classes, meeting each new teacher, if the teacher WAS indeed new to me ( actualy I only had to "meet" about three of them....) and gwtting aquainted with the class' sylabys.

I got homework, three things in spannish, (really only like, one, but my teacher considders it three...) and one in Math.

When attempting to do the math durring class, I realized that over the summer, I've become stupid. >.< I had to ask how to put together an equation with the slope and y-int given to me.

Stupid Stupid Stupid.

Waking Nightmares

I don't know what it is about laying prostrate in bed at the middle of the night, but I never can get the bad thoughts out of my head. Its like I'm a little paranoid at night... Just, whenever my mind has nothing to do, it drives me nuts.

Thats why I end up staying up so late at night, because every night I try to go abed early, I end up anxious. I stress about things to come, and more-and more I wish I had an expectation free life.

Durring school, it was that I was behind in my classes, and I always had something I wasn't doing that I should. I had expected that to go away durring the summer, but it seems that no matter what is going on around me, I can find something at night to haunt me, to make my chest tighten, and my breath heavy.

I hate it.

Who? What? When? Where? Why?

Who is time?

What is forever?

When is love?

Where is reason?

Why is life?